Monday, October 21, 2013

Adapted by Motherhood

Chris and I spent a short bit (a long bit) of time the other night clicking through baby photos of Ryan (yep, Baby #2 is due in a week and I still don't have photos of my firstborn printed out. Millenial mama?), and I just had to chuckle a bit and furrow my brow a little at what I remembered that baby looking like compared to what my oh-so-professional phone photos captured.  All of this then got me thinking about how I have changed in the jungle of motherhood.
So, the five senses. Have mine changed? Yes, I think so. Mothers have to adapt, after all.


>>> Feline Fine - Can successfully make it from the bed to to the child with nary a toe stub in the pitch black dark. 

>>> Rogaine Strength - If everyone had a mother's eyes, Rogaine would be unnecessary. I never saw my child this bald:

But he was. 

>>> Clearly Better Than Clearasil - What baby acne? I don't see it. Teens all over the world wish that this power could be bottled up and sold at Walgreens across from the Haribo candy. 


>>> Batman Has Nothing On Me - Not only can I anticipate sound and wake up before my baby cries, I can also hear the faintest scratch of a pencil on a wall. 

>>> Better Than a UN Translator - Frantic arm waving. Squeal and squawk. Yes, that is a bird in a tree! 

>>> Fear of Silence: Silence = Destruction. 


>>> Mom Bounce - She's got the rhythm (and baby's got to snooze) (Alan Jackson, anyone?)

>>>In addition, see above for navigating through a dark room ability.


>>> Apathetic to Ideal Temperatures - A room temperature dinner just magnifies the flavors, right? 

>>> Standards Set to Sink Half Empty - Oh does that food allow for zero dish usage? Bingo, we have a winner. 


>>> Hound Strong - Bomb or bullet, in this case, she who smelt it, did not dealt it, but probably has to change it. 

>>> Perfumist - How else could a newborn always, always smell like the best in the world amid spit up and diaper bombs?

Anyone have anything to add? Make me laugh, my friends! 


  1. Very funny, I love the one about the sink half empty. I feed my kids one after the other so they all use the same plate. Food on the floor "oh, just eat it" (three second rule or whatever) and I don't have to use a thermometer to know when they're feverish :)

  2. I thoroughly enjoyed this post! So sweet, funny, and cleverly written!

  3. I love this! And to make you feel better, my youngest is almost 9 and the MAJORITY of pictures that include him reside on my computer. Seriously. The picture of Ryan with the paint is priceless - his look screams "What?!"

  4. Hahaha! This is so perfect! Anything to keep from dirtying more dishes. ;) and yes to the waking up to everything kid-related, even though I sleep through Joe's alarm every single day.